Monday, May 13, 2013

Being a mom...

Yesterday made me think a lot about being a mom.  15 years (almost 16) ago I became a mom to my Tater.  It was such a wonderful and yet difficult time in my life.  One day I was only responsible for myself and the next I had this sweet baby who suffered from colic and was completely dependent on me.  To say the least it was an experience that tested me beyond my limits.  I had this idea of what parenthood was supposed to be and to be truthful it didn't live up to that expectation.  I felt so guilty for feeling that way!!  There were days when I felt like I was a complete failure (and there still are).  How could I be home all day and not have all of the laundry caught up?  How did I not get a 5 course dinner on the table?  When I had daydreamed of being a new mom I truly thought that I would be able to accomplish all of these things...all while dancing around in pre-pregnancy jeans. 

I look back and am sad that I was so hard on myself because now I realize that my daydream was not realistic!!  Today with all of the social media I feel like the expectations of a mom are even greater.  People posting all of the fabulous things that they accomplished over the weekend on facebook...Pinterest filled with millions of wonderful things that "good moms" should be doing...blogs (like my own) that show perfectly plated meals and projects.  The fact is that when we see all of these people doing all of these wonderful clean and pressed clothes...with huge smiles on their (and their that really ever happens) faces...we aren't seeing everything...we are seeing their "highlight reel".  Do you really think that the plates of food that I serve my family look like the one's that I blog??  They don't...I have deliberately plated the food to look super appetizing so that you will look at it and want to recreate it for your family.  My kids serve themselves and most of the time we are all eating at different times and in different rooms of my home.  Some nights a PB&J is all I can get done. 

My point is that as a mom we all want the very best for our kids.  When we daydream or see others who look like they have it all together it can be deflating.  After parenting for 15 years here are a few things that I know...

*By the time pre-prenancy jeans fit again (if they do) they will be out of style.
*Wearing bubble necklaces, chevron print dresses and heals aren't what "real mom's" wear everyday...comfort wins every time ( pants)
*Dinner a night or two a week from the frozen food section of the grocery store or local fast food joint is not only enjoyed by kids but preferred.
*Carefully manicured chore charts work great for about a then you are out of stickers and the patience to keep them up.
*A five course meal is nice on occasion but some of the best meals I have had with my kids are a bowl of cereal around the coffee table.
*Keeping a house "company ready" when you have kids is like saying you could run a 10k without any training.
*Staying up until midnight to decorate 30+ cookies for your child's school event will make you very tired and the kids won't appreciate a package of Oreos.
*Volunteering for EVERY activity that your children are in will be the death of you...choose wisely.
*Just because a pin says "The best recipe ever" doesn't mean it is...cut yourself some slack when it isn't.
*A box and the tube from inside a roll of paper towels can entertain a child better than a $50.00 the money.
*Perfectly curling every inch of your hair with a straight iron may be beautiful but it doesn't make you a better mom...throw it up in a ponytail and go play with your kids.

The fact is that the only things that really matter when you are a mom is that you love, protect and spend quality time your children.  How we get there is our own story...we write our own chapters and have our own "highlight reels".  The things I appreciate and treasure most about my mom are the things she did that the other moms didn't do.  Being yourself makes you the unique mom that you are...the mom that your kids love and sometimes when you look around the internet you can forget that.  As moms we need to give ourselves a break and just enjoy our babies! Sweet moms-

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